How should a wife be?

The relations between husband and wife are one of love and affection.  A wife is a means of comfort and solace for the husband, as Allah says in the Holy Quran:

 

And He (Allah) is the One Who has created you from a single soul and made his spouse from that, so that he might find comfort in her. Then when man covers her, she conceives and, bearing a light burden, moves around. Later, when she grows heavy, then both pray to their Lord, Allah: ?If You give us a healthy child, we shall certainly be amongst the thankful.?  Surah A’araaf (7:189)

 

A wife is obedient to her husband, a means of joy for him and wishes him good both in his presence and absence.

 

There is a Hadith in Sunan Ibn Majah:

 

Translation:  Hadhrat Abu Umama (May Allah be well pleased with him) relates from the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) that He said:  A believer has not received a bounty better than a virtuous wife after the fear of Allah.  If he orders her, she obeys him.  If he sees her, she delights him.  If he swears by her, she fulfills it and even if the husband is absent, she wishes him well through her self and in the husband’s wealth.  (Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith No. 1857)

 

It should be noted that taking swearing by the wife’s name is used only as an illustration otherwise swearing by any other name other than Allah’s is not permissible at all.

 

There is a Hadith in Mishkaat Ul Masabeeh:

 

Translation: It is narrated on the authority of Hadhrat Anas (May Allah be well pleased with him) that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said:  If a woman offers the 5 daily Salaat regularly, fasts in Ramadhan, guards her chastity and obeys her husband, then she will be allowed to enter paradise from any of its doors that she wants to.  (Mishkaat Ul Masabeeh, Pg. No. 281)

 

On one hand, these glad tidings are given for an obedient wife and on the other, there are severe warnings for a disobedient wife who displeases her husband.  There is a Hadith in Sahih Bukhari:

 

Translation: It is narrated on the authority of Hadhrat Abu Hurairah (May Allah be well pleased with him) that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said:  If the husband calls the wife to the bed and she refuses and the husband spends the night in anger, then the angels curse the woman until dawn.  (Sahih Bukhari, Hadith No.  3237)

 

There is a Hadith in Shua’bul Iman:

 

Translation: It is narrated on the authority of Hadhrat Jabir (May Allah be well pleased with him) that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said:  There are 3 people of whom neither a Salaat is accepted nor any good deed is greeted with acceptance, a slave who has run away until he returns to his master and places his hand in the hand of his master, a woman whose husband is displeased with her, an intoxicated person until he sobers.  (Shua’bul Iman, Hadith No. 8470)

 

The wife should obey the husband and try her best to please him.