Physical relations before marriage -(II)

[The first part of this article ran here.  This is the second part]  

In support of consensual sexual relations before marriage, the west says that there should be mutual relations before marriage as this enables the man and the woman to understand each other.

 

The whole world knows the results of this approach.  Many women become pregnant before marriage and have to abort out of fear of facing the society and/or their parents/guardian or for some other reasons.

 

As long as relationships to "understand each other" are concerned, the results of this are also obvious.  However, Islam has given such a method of doing so that neither modesty is compromised nor the need is left unfulfilled.

 

The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) has said about seeing the face of the fiancé/fiancée before marriage:

 

Translation:  You see her as this seeing is a means of eternal love between you.  (Jame’ Tirmidhi, Vol. 1, Pg. No. 207)

 

For the proposal of marriage, seeing only the face and palms is mentioned in the Hadith.  Seeing the face is to judge the beauty and seeing the palms is to judge the body.  If more details are desired, then a reliable woman can be sent to the bride and all other details can be had.  In the same way, if the girl desires to see the groom before marriage, the Shariah permits this as well.  As given in Radd Ul Muhtaar, Kitab Ul Hazri Wal Ibaha.

 

Sexual relations before marriage are such that no religion of the world permits it.  They know that to permit it is to drive the society towards disaster.

 

As long as marriage is not done, the boy and the girl are non-Mahram for each other.  Having relations with a non-Mahram woman, talking to her, seeing her, meeting her is all impermissible and forbidden.  Maintaining sexual relations before marriage is such an act that rouses the wrath of Allah Most High.

 

Things which lead to adulterous relationships before marriage

 

1.  Lack of Islamic education.

 

2.  Carelessness in proper upbringing of the children.

 

3.  Company of indecent people.

 

4.  Sex education in schools.

 

5.  TV and films.

 

6.  Misuse of Internet and phone.

 

7.  Coeducation in schools/colleges.

 

8.  Indecent literature.

 

9.  Not practicing Islamic Purdah.

 

10. Delay in marriage.

 

In light of Islamic guidelines, the following have been suggested to curb illicit sexual relationships:

 

1.  Following the Sunnah in performing marriage.

 

2.  Avoiding everything which may lead to adultery.