Treating non-Muslim parents nicely
Maintaining good relations with non-Muslims relatives, treating them with beneficence and helping and sympathizing with them has been stressed extraordinarily. Almighty Allah says in the Holy Quran:
وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِي الدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًا
(Even if parents are non-Muslim), treat them nicely.[1]
There is a Hadith in Sahih Bukhari in this regard:
حَدَّثَنَا هِشَامُ بْنُ عُرْوَةَ أَخْبَرَنِى أَبِى أَخْبَرَتْنِى أَسْمَاءُ ابْنَةُ أَبِى بَكْرٍ - رضى الله عنهما - قَالَتْ أَتَتْنِى أُمِّى رَاغِبَةً فِى عَهْدِ النَّبِىِّ - صلى الله عليه وسلم - فَسَأَلْتُ النَّبِىَّ - صلى الله عليه وسلم - آصِلُهَا قَالَ « نَعَمْ » . قَالَ ابْنُ عُيَيْنَةَ فَأَنْزَلَ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى فِيهَا. لَا يَنْهَاكُمُ اللَّهُ عَنِ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يُقَاتِلُوكُمْ فِي الدِّينِ وَلَمْ يُخْرِجُوكُم مِّن دِيَارِكُمْ أَن تَبَرُّوهُمْ وَتُقْسِطُوا إِلَيْهِمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُقْسِطِينَO
Translation: Hadhrat Hishaam bin ‘Urwa (May Allah be well pleased with him) narrates on the authority of his father that Hadhrat Asma bint Abu Bakr told him: In the era of the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam), my mother came to me in the hope that I will take care of her. I asked the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam): Can I treat her nicely? He said: Yes. Hadhrat Sufyan bin ‘Uyainah (May Allah be well pleased with him) says that this verse of the Holy Quran was revealed about this: Allah does not forbid you to be good to them and treat them with equity and justice who did not fight against you on (the question of) Din (Religion), nor did they drive you out of your homes (i.e., homeland). Surely, Allah likes those who conduct themselves with equity and justice (Surah Mumtahina-08) [2]
Even when non-Muslim parents force one towards apostasy and disbelief, they must be treated with kindness. It is not permitted to mistreat them because of their apostasy, even though this order of theirs will not be obeyed.
If the non-Muslim parents are needy, they should be treated with kindness through money as much as possible. They should be spoken with gently and they should be invited towards Islam affectionately and softly.